tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post5874536512304290621..comments2024-02-28T05:22:16.853-05:00Comments on I Won't Fear Love: In the company of menJuliahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09745262857388007041noreply@blogger.comBlogger11125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-89461652530649000582007-11-26T10:04:00.000-05:002007-11-26T10:04:00.000-05:00OMG, Is Dr. Young Guns getting blown by the nurse ...OMG, Is Dr. Young Guns getting blown by the nurse or something???<BR/><BR/>And, yes, I deal with unpleasant people ALL the time.thricehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09528308384855206125noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-83922847274716055692007-11-15T12:26:00.000-05:002007-11-15T12:26:00.000-05:00I'm a nurse in a medical ICU. I deal with obnoxio...I'm a nurse in a medical ICU. I deal with obnoxious people a lot. I think some of them are annoying because they're in a very stressful situation and some of them are just jerks. I doubt that I treat everyone the same, but I try very hard to treat everyone respectfully, even the ones who are verbally abusive. I will say, however, that it's easier to be extra-special nice to the nice ones.<BR/><BR/>I think your RE and his nurse are behaving unprofessionally.Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08293892189430836712noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-1997582346323519922007-11-15T05:42:00.000-05:002007-11-15T05:42:00.000-05:00ummm yeah. Like some of my idiot students. I got...ummm yeah. Like some of my idiot students. I got lots of good stories. Usually i overcompensate with kindness to make sure that my real feelings don't show. Which actually works because you are essentially giving people enough rope to hang themselves with...<BR/><BR/>In your case i *do* think the dr. was very unprofessional vbut your diagnosis of his mental state is probably accurate. And it was good of you to email to apologize...never hurts.katehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16536809590856333391noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-58964169756254963502007-11-14T22:48:00.000-05:002007-11-14T22:48:00.000-05:00Thank you all for your righteous indignation. I th...Thank you all for your righteous indignation. I thought about it all day today, and I think this is how Dr YoungGun's inexperience is showing. He is apparently a very hot shot medically, and his practice is growing by leaps and bounds, but I came to think that he doesn't yet feel the pain infertility causes in his bones. He is very loyal to his staff, and he said so directly. The part he doesn't appreciate yet, I think, is how infertiles tend to feel about time. And the part where he seems to think that human nature might lead to sub-par treatment for those who upset his staff, but not to an infertile getting upset at unforeseen delays, presented ever so cheerfully, seems like it has the very same root cause. <BR/><BR/>Anyway, she emailed me back today. Said she appreciated it. I would've liked a more thoughtful response, but whatever. As long as I end up knocked up, I can deal with it.Juliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09745262857388007041noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-91702533280305228032007-11-14T21:23:00.000-05:002007-11-14T21:23:00.000-05:00i have to say that i think it's human nature. but...i have to say that i think it's human nature. but most people realize the inappropriateness of the reaction, so contain it, UNLIKE your doctor.Shttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05602868040771218507noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-71047799045586298572007-11-14T20:25:00.000-05:002007-11-14T20:25:00.000-05:00I am surprised by your doctor and the nurse. To an...I am surprised by your doctor and the nurse. <BR/><BR/>To answer your question, I do deal with unpleasant people and sometimes, my feelings do have an effect on how I treat them.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-68767304244467650442007-11-14T20:07:00.000-05:002007-11-14T20:07:00.000-05:00I haven't been able to pick up my jaw. He said wha...I haven't been able to pick up my jaw. He said <B><I>what</B></I>?! What kind of passive-aggressive sh*t is that?!<BR/><BR/>It is every shade of inappropriate and unprofessional. <BR/><BR/>Wow. I'm really sorry.Lideshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05639247123614128212noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-71635233155041585022007-11-14T14:00:00.000-05:002007-11-14T14:00:00.000-05:00This is very very unprofessional. Both the Doctor ...This is very very unprofessional. <BR/><BR/>Both the Doctor and the nurse said the wrong thing, and you really need to let them know. People in fertility clinics regularly deal with upset, angry, sad, grieving people. It's part of the job and if she thinks that you will be the last person to get upset with her, she's a fool.<BR/><BR/>And he doesn't have the right to say that. Threatening a patient with refusal of treatment is unethical. If she feels that way, then he should fire her.<BR/><BR/>They are supposed to treat the patient in front of them to the best of their ability. No doctor or nurse can ever refuse. <BR/><BR/>Honestly, it's true. I think you should call him back and make it clear that you expect the best treatment possible or else. He had no right to do that to you.Aureliahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13691032415028867902noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-200607623549512052007-11-14T11:45:00.000-05:002007-11-14T11:45:00.000-05:00I was just talking about this. How I would like t...I was just talking about this. How I would like to be more assertive with the nurses, but I don't want to worry about making a bad relationship with them. The old "please don't spit in my food now" fear.<BR/><BR/>I do find it somewhat unprofessional that Dr. YG would mention that. She can hate you all she wants, but she still has to do her job, correctly and professionally.<BR/><BR/>However, having said that, I have worked in many jobs with demanding people. I think I tend to *hurry* them more, just in the sense that I don't want to spend more time with them than I have to, but I don't think they get less service. In fact, sometimes they get more because they are asking for things, and I am in a hurry to get them out of there, so I do it.<BR/><BR/>This is a tough one for me. I am always one of the *nice* ones, that people like, but it hardly ever gets me anywhere. This pregnancy especially I've struggled with this.<BR/><BR/>Personally, you had every right to get annoyed with her, and every right to demand what you need, but, there is nothing wrong with throwing a little honey her way later to keep the relationship smooth.ms. Ghttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15263348912679823512noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-72977096726575628512007-11-14T09:25:00.000-05:002007-11-14T09:25:00.000-05:00Well, currently I have to deal with an annoying pe...Well, currently I have to deal with an annoying person but she has too much power for me to really act on my annoyance. Hence my decision to take a little break until the baby arrives. Avoidance.<BR/><BR/>Teaching though, is a good example of a situation where you have to put your feelings aside, look at the whole story, and just suck it up around a lot of unpleasantness. I don't have space for whole narratives, but one story sticks out especially. Long story short, he was a star athlete, at the U on a scholarship. I discovered he couldn't actually read at anywhere near a college level. I spent hours and hours trying to help the kid at least pass my class. He lied to me and the professor, though, at a certain point to gain extra time/points on something, by telling us he had leukemia. I was angry when I learned the truth, but calmly explained that I understood he was overwhelmed, and I'd be glad to help him find whatever university resources were available to help him, but that he'd really compromised my trust by lying. The professor really freaked out on him, yelling loudly at him in the hallway one day after class. The kid then lied about me, saying I'd refused to give him any help. I was <I>furious</I>, but realized it had nothing really to do with me. The prof wanted to take disciplinary action, but he was a first semester freshman, clearly in over his head and clearly exploited by the athletic culture of this place. I argued for him once again and he failed the class but got to stay in the university. The kid had some integrity though, because he was really grateful towards me in the end and was always friendly when we saw each other on campus. I had him again later in a class, he still performed crappily but could manage enough to pass, and I definitely successfully pulled off not holding the earlier experience against him. <BR/><BR/>I think it's RIDICULOUS for Dr. YoungGun to have inferred, or for his nurse to think it's acceptable, to change how they treat you based on that silly conversation. When you were justifiably upset and an advocate for yourself.Beruriahhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07171541078529309991noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8214358853640360621.post-70445534521876481212007-11-14T09:16:00.000-05:002007-11-14T09:16:00.000-05:00I pretty much only deal with unpleasant people. B...I pretty much only deal with unpleasant people. But some are more unpleasant than others.niobehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10685766216611639434noreply@blogger.com