So I have been wearing maternity since Tuesday. Physically it feels so much better-- no pinching, no squashing. But it also feels like announcing, and that is by no means comfortable. So I have been walking around wrapped in a giant scarf-shawl thing, and mostly hiding in my office at work. Seems like a reasonable compromise.
Natalie recently talked about how hard it is to tell people, to catch a glimpse of their anticipated joy on your behalf right before you have to tell them of the tragedy that befall you and yours. It wasn't until later that I realized that a not insignificant part of the reason I am uneasy with being obviously pregnant is that it's going to force me to tell the story, to break the news so to speak, to people who don't yet know. Not looking forward to stupid things people might say is one thing, and that is still very much on my mind, but it seems I have another concern. I am apparently also not looking forward to being the designated buzzkill.
I don't know whether this is the maternity clothing, the anatomical ultrasound we have tomorrow, or approaching 20 weeks, but I have been obsessing