Friday, August 15, 2008

4:11am

I expected labor to go fast. I didn't expect it to go this fast. We left the house at 2am, arrived on the maternity floor around 2:25. Got the first cervical check at 2:45-- 4cm, 80%, bag ruptured. Delivered at 4:11. Seconds later-- a cry. Righteously pissed off baby, the dream that dared not speak its name, that didn't even dare to paint a self-portrait in my mind's eye, he was suddenly very corporeally here.

He punked out after that. Turns out you really should get all of the liquid out of the lungs if you are planning on using them for breathing. Who knew?

NICU, CPAP-- it all sounds a lot worse than it is. In reality, he had been trying to get the CPAP out for hours, and succeeded finally towards the evening, so now they are just watching. By which I mean measuring and recording. He is on IV sugar solution, but when he keeps his respiratory rate where they want it, I get to try breastfeeding. I have been pumping in the meantime, and feeling my uterus contract but good (all hail motrin! with a side order of per.coset!).

I didn't sleep last night, and only a couple of short naps today. I am in need of a solid sleep, and am failing pretty bad at keeping it at bay in order to keep writing. So I will wrap up now, and hope that putting together complete sentences comes easier in the morning.

Yes, he is still in NICU. But it's a warm and fuzzy NICU, the version where we don't really need to worry about his life, or even his health in the long run. He may have to stay there for a few days more, or he may get to come up to the Special Care nursery that is literally next door to my room on the antepartum floor, but it seems that even I am talking all about the when of going home, rather than the if.

Thank you, all, for being here through my long journey to when. It has meant more than I can express, especially in my current sleep-deprived state. But you can be sure that I will try to, another day.

Oh, and Monkey had been by.

 

127 comments:

Anonymous said...

Congratulations. He looks wonderful.

m said...

Congratulations to you! What a beautiful little boy - I just love the picture of him and Monkey.

I can't imagine the emotions running through you right now - and I am so, so happy for you.

Much love

x

Kymberli said...

Beautiful. So happy, so overjoyed for you all.

luna said...

oh julia, how wonderful! congratulations to all of you. I've been thinking about you and wondering if you were in labor when we hadn't heard from you in a few days. so so happy for you all! that photo is just precious. xo

mel said...

Congrats on the birth of your gorgeous son!

Read your last post after work today-been out of town-and now, WOW!!

Mazel Tov!

Coggy said...

Congratulations Julia such good news to wake up to! He looks so cute. I'm so pleased for you all. Much love x

jenna said...

congratulations!!

Rosepetal said...

Oh my goodness, I haven't even read all the post, except for he's here and he's okay!

SO HAPPY FOR YOU - what wonderful news. Congratulations!!!!!

Veronica said...

Delurking to add my congratulations.

The photo is gorgeous.

Beruriah said...

I'm too happy for words.

Mazel Tov!

Cat, Galloping said...

What a relief. I could not be happier for you. Congratulations!

Tash said...

Phew. Just phew.

And congratulations.

And let's come home already, m'kay?

Boulder said...

Julia, Congratulations & a huge sigh of happiness to you all. I hope his NICU stay is brief and a distant memory in the not too far future. Just so happy for you!

niobe said...

Many, many congratulations. I am thrilled, absolutely over the moon for you and your family.

Antigone said...

Enjoy. I, too, am thrilled for you.

sweetsalty kate said...

Look at that big sister! Good girl. And fantastic job mama. I'm so full up in the heart today for you.
xoxoxo

Anonymous said...

Cogratulations! What a beautiful little boy!

a- said...

OMG! YOU DID IT!!!! Congratulations on a job well done Julia. I'm on cloud nine for you and your family.

a- said...
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a- said...
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My Reality said...

Julia, I am so happy for you! Congrats on your son!

slouching mom said...

AHHHHH!

CONGRATULATIONS!

I am so thrilled for you and your family.

He's beautiful.

Choofy Mama said...

Congrats mama. I am 9w pregnant with my post loss baby...20 months after my stillbirth...your post, your story, gives me hope.

<3

JEN

N said...

Congratulations. ♥

CLC said...

Congratulationsto you and your family! I am so thrilled that he is finally here. What a beautiful picture!

misha said...

Mazel Tov!

Bon said...

Julia, their two little heads there melted me.

they are beautiful. i am glad he is here safely.

rest now, friend. i smile into the ether today at you, mother of three.

Dayna said...

Thrilled for you, and keeping you all in my thoughts.

christina(apronstrings) said...

ohhhhhh. julia! congrats. he's here. deep sigh of relief, eh?
my niece came much earlier, and we worried so, but i kept thinking--that really, the NICU is the most safe place he'll ever be in his life.
i am so happy for you all. how's the monkster?

the dragonfly said...

niobe sent me...congratulations!!

:)

Casey said...

Congratulations!

Beth said...

Oh my! Oh I am so happy for you! For all of you, to have reached this place. Tears of joy and relief here. {{hugs}}

Amelie said...

Congratulations, Julia! I'm so very happy for you and your family. So happy.

yummysushipajamas said...

I am so very, very happy for you and your family. I can't wait to see how he will thrive.

Aurelia said...

Congratulations!!!!!

I am so very happy for you and your family!

Karen said...

wow! hurray! I'm so happy for you all!

Busted said...

Congratulations. This post brought me to tears. I can't wait to see WHEN (not if) you bring him home.

c. said...

I'm thrilled for you, Julia. So very happy. Congratulations to you and your family. I hope the stay in NICU is short. Thinking of you all. XO.

AnnaMarie said...

Congratulations! What a joyful and inspiring post!

k@lakly said...

Oh Julia,
I usually hate to cry first thing in the morning, but not when the tears are from pure joy. And so one journey ends another begins. Hoping you are all home safe and soon and that your lifetime together is long and sweet and always filled with laughter.
Much love to all of you, oh and huge CONGRATULATIONS!
xxoo

debbie said...

Yay! That's such wonderful news. He is absolutely beautiful. Having never met you in person, I don't even find it strange that my heart is so filled with joy for you.
Congratulations, Julia!

Lollipop Goldstein said...

I am so incredibly happy for you. Congratulations!

Dee said...

Oh, Julia. I'm so happy for you and Monkey and JD.

Lori said...

Congrats, Julia. So happy for you and your family.

This really starts my day out right!

janis said...

I am just going nuts with happiness and excitement for you and your family.
Congratulations!!
I wish I can come by and visit too, and to hug and oogle and drool.
Rest up, mama, you did awesome!! ((hugs))

Cindy said...

Heartfelt congratulations to you and your beautiful family! Thanks so much for taking the time to write this post - it means so much to so many.

mareng9 said...

Congratulations! What a cute baby :) I am so, so glad that everyone made it safely to the other side. What a wonderful relief/happiness/everything for you.

Anonymous said...

Oh Julia~
He is gorgeous! I'm a long time lurker here, but had to comment. I am SO thrilled for your family. :)

Dianna

Beth said...

delurking to say: oh my oh my, congratulations! Absolutely full of joy for you.

HMC said...

Congratulations. I am so thrilled for you all!

kate said...

Oh beautiful! A million congratulations!!!

Sylvie said...

Wow, congratulations. Mazal Tov!!!

Waiting Amy said...

So thrilled for you and Monkey and the Mr.! Glad you are all well and will soon be out of the NICU.

Zee said...

Congratulations, Julia. Way to go!

dawny said...

Delurking to send your family lots of love. He's a beauty.

Jen said...

Congratulations Julia! I am so overwhelmingly delighted to hear your wonderful news. I hope everything goes very smoothly from here.

Very best wishes to you and your family,
Jen

loribeth said...

Congratulations!! What a sweet photo! I hope you are both home soon.

Ashleigh said...

Congratulations to you- our journeys have been parallel in so many ways- i feel such a conntection and can't wait until we are both home with our little ones.


XOXO

Erin said...

Delurking to say congratulations!

Anonymous said...

Long time lurker but delurking to say that I'm so fantastically happy for you. Wonderful news! Many, many congratulations!

Amanda said...

Congratulations!! What a joy he is!!

crunchycarpets said...

Wonderful..just wonderful

Magpie said...

I'm so happy for you. Big welcome to the little boy.

Kathleen said...

Yay! Yay! Congratulations! Welcome to the world, little baby.

charmedgirl said...

so happy for you guys!! for real!!!

Ange said...

Wow congratulations to you. How sweet a little boy. I am sure he will be with you very soon. So so happy for you.

missing_one said...

Congratulations!!!! I am so happy for you guys!

Phantom Scribbler said...

Oh, mazel tov to you and your husband and big sister Monkey!

Michelle said...

Congratulations! And welcome to the world, little one.

Can't wait to hear more about him!

Michelle
(from GITW)

Betty M said...

Oh many many congratulations to all of you! He looks very cute indeed. Mazel tov indeed!

Amy said...

Congratulations! I'm crying happy tears for you and yours! Welcome new boy to the world!

Sarah said...

Delurking to say, Congratulations to the whole family! What a gorgeous picture! Try to get as much sleep as you can before you all head home. I'm so happy for you all.

Heather said...

That is so wonderful.

Welcome, sweet boy!

Tressa & Mark said...

Congratulations!! What a blessing!

Alex said...

Delurking (again?) to say congratulations.

Lori said...

What a perfect ending to my day! I am utterly shocked but oh, so very thrilled!

Welcome, welcome... beautiful boy.

AmyinMotown said...

Sometimes "Thank God" is a tossed off comment, meaning nothing, really.

Sometimes it comes from the depth of my soul. Like today. Thank God, he's here. And what a sweet and beautiful baby he is.

Much congratulations to your beautiful new little family.

Kate said...

How truly wonderful for your family. I am so glad that this is where you ended up.

He's beautiful. I'm especially fond of his pink hat!

delphi said...

I couldn't be any happier for anyone. Congratulations!!! I am overjoyed!!! He is so beautiful!!!

STE said...

Wonderful, wonderful news! So glad your new little love has arrived safely!

Congratulations and love to your wonderful family!

BreezieGirl said...

Congratulations... what a beautiful picture of him and Monkey and what joy to have a when!

melody is slurping life said...

Blessing upon blessing to your new child and you and your family forever and ever.

Found you because Kate honored me by using my photo and a quote to announce your precious gift at Glow in the Woods.

Give him a little kiss upon the head for me...a stranger who is oh so happy he is in the world.

Wabi said...

I'm so relieved, and happy for you! Wishing you both a speedy trip home.

You did it. You made it through!

Artblog said...

Congrats on your little boy :)

Maddy said...

[Newbie] Congratulations indeed.
Very best wishes

Ya Chun said...

Yay!

Tiffi33 said...

YAY!
congrats! He is gorgeous!!!

thordora said...

I explode babies myself. I understand. :)

Congrats, and joy and wonder and all those things you'll be much too busy to feel for the next few weeks.

Mama said...

Oh Sweetie!

I am beside myself with happiness, joy and sweet relief. Tears streaming from my eyes! So much congratulations and love to you and your family. He looks beautiful.

Your emotions must be so HIGH!
You did it Julia, you did it.

SO much love to you!
xoxoxoxoxoxoxo!
Erin

FeyIndigoWolf said...

Oh Congratulations!!!!!!! Fabulous news!

Caro said...

Congratulations!

rebecca said...

Congratulations to you and your family. I am so happy for you, your news brings such hope. Thinking of you and your three children...

Lisa b said...

Congratulations!

LAS said...

Congratulations!! I am so happy for you!

jo(e) said...

Congratulations!

Mandy said...

I just let out a deep breath I didn't even know I'd been holding.

I'm cheering for joy. So, so happy for all of you, sweetie. Can't wait to see further updates when sleep and time permit.

Melina said...

Congratulations. I am so happy for you.

Meghan said...

Congrats!!! So glad he's here and doing better now

ms. G said...

Julia, I am grinning from ear to ear!!! I am so happy for you, and your family, big, big hugs to you all!!

You made it! You got through it!

Love the picture too

Jenny F. Scientist said...

Congratulations! Very happy for all of you.

Jenny F. Scientist said...

P.S. Can I have a labor like that? Pretty please?

Catherine said...

Congratulations my friend! I am so very happy for you!

Julia S said...

Thrilled for you.

Snickollet said...

Congratulations!

If *I'm* breathing a bit easier with this news as I cry some tears of joy, then I can only imagine how *you* feel.

Love to your whole family from mine.

Mandy said...

I keep coming back to look at that picture.

It warms my heart so much, I'm just thrilled for you!

Lynnette said...

Gorgeous...Such a sweet picture! Congratulations!

Nicole said...

I am in a state of total glory for you and your family. INCREDIBLE!!!

Miryam (mama o' the matrices) said...

*hug* to you all. All four.

I told the Eldest, and he looked at me quietly, as if he was remembering something important. "Tell Monkey to be gentle with his head," he says, wisely.

I told him that I rather thought she would. Mazal tov to you all..

thrice said...

I made havdalah and saw. I too was surprised by my big sigh of relief.

I am so, utterly, happy for JR, Monkey and you.

Losh said...

Congratulations Julia & Family.
So glad that 'if' changed to 'when'and 'when' is now!
Best wishes for a speedy homecoming to you both.

christyna said...

thats the best birthday present I ever got! YAY. I am SO happy for you, so happy. LOVE that boy up!!

Vicki said...

How wonderful!!! Way to go! I'm so very happy for you.

Wordgirl said...

I have been visiting here and there but wanted to peek my head out of the darkness to congratulate you and your beautiful family.

XO

Pam

Rachel Inbar said...

Congratulations :-)

hisaak said...

I have visited for quite some time and thought I would break my silence to say congratulations!!

Ahuva Batya said...

Mazel Tov to you and your new family!!

CappyPrincess said...

What wonderful news! Hopefully his time in the NICU is short and he is able to join the rest of your family at home very soon.

A.M.S. said...

Many heartfelt congratulations. I'm so very happy for you!

Anonymous said...

So happy for you! Congratulations!!! Yay!!!

mgt said...

Julia, congratulations on your new arrival. I hope that you both get to go home very soon.

Thank you for continuing to provide inspiration, and hope, by sharing your story.

wannabe mom said...

oh my gosh, i am glad that he is here. relieved. he is beautiful. that he is in the NICU with no cause for concern is also beautiful. much love to your family and your new little one!

S. said...

Mazel tov! He is perfect.

MereMortal said...

blessed, blessed be!
love and peace to you and your newly expanded family.
you are a strong, amazing birther and mama!
OM shanti, shanti, shanti.

tonya said...

Congratulations on the birth of your son! My boy was a feeder and grower in NICU for 17 days, and it seemed interminable at the time. I hope you are united soon!

urban-pagan said...

Yeay! Soooooo happy for you. Lot's of love to you and your new boy.

Loralee Choate said...

I am so late here, but I came via Glow in the woods and had to say CONGRATULATIONS.

It's from deep in my heart.

George said...

I came via GITW and just wanted to say congrats. I am glad you can breath easy and enjoy now, I'm sure the waiting must have been agonising.