Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Day 3

No, not CD3-- that would be too much to hope for, apparently. For the record, it's CD 62. Fun times.

No, it's day 3 of my last ditch effort diet. My mantra is "it's only ten days," but my secret psychological weapon is Yom Kippur that starts on the evening of the sixth day. So I am half way to that, and kind of looking forward to it since not eating anything will be a nice break from eating this stuff. And by this time a week from now I will have eaten my first apple in ten whole days. And believe you me, that will be the best apple ever. It will then take a couple more days to get back to all the normal food, so this thing is much more like two weeks than ten days, but again-- psychological games is how I get through it. That and it helps pass the time while I wait for the doctors.

Speaking of which, tomorrow is Dr.BigShot. We had a little dust-up with our insurance company over the referral, but it's resolved now. Why do I feel like it will still be a gigantic waste of time tomorrow?

Also, when this diet experiment is over, and I am back to my normal diet (I much prefer this latter meaning of the word "diet"-- the way one eats, to the former one, temporary change to one's eating habits with the goal of loosing weight) it will be less than two weeks to the RE appointment. By the way, in my last post I didn't mean to imply that I would love nothing better than to get me some needles and to finally get to try what all the cool kids have been doing for years, by which I of course mean IVF, not vodka-injected watermelon (the comment that is likely responsible for a few nightmares as unsuspecting seekers of a new way to get boozy find instead a discussion of BFN rituals). In fact, not so long ago I was bitching about having to find an RE. And that still stands-- I spent the last 8 years doing things to avoid having to have one, and I don't like to loose. But I am also not going to stick fingers in my ears and sing "la-la-la-la" to avoid acknowledging that I have been beat. And if I have, it's time for a new plan. And if that new plan includes needles, so be it. All I'm sayin'.

And now for an unrelated brag. Because I have to. JD is off on a business trip, which means that I had to bring Monkey to school with me tonight for the Curriculum Night, which was supposed to be a no-munchkin affair. Since we were going there straight after her gymnastics class where we had gone straight from school, and since she is a little sniffly, I was pretty much prepared to have to leave right away, or at some point before the thing was over. But she did so much better than I had any right to expect-- she sat quietly and drew for the portion of the evening where various admin types and specialized teachers (art, music, gym) told us about their approaches and broad curriculum outlines for the year, and then she just amused herself for the hour and a half we spent in the K room while her teachers told us in much more detail about what is in store for us this year. I am really proud. Unfortunately, that ended up meaning she was late going to bed, so I hope she will be ok getting up in the morning. She can be a little (read: a lot) grumpy sometimes, and after tonight I almost feel like I am due for it.

5 comments:

Beruriah said...

I hope Monkey is up and off happily to school. Very impressive that she behaved last night.

I like how you've set markers for yourself in the wait for the RE appointment. Good strategy.

I don't think you implied anything about loving the idea of IVF - just that you're grateful to have options for moving forward now, rather than later. I am so so glad about that, too. Holding patterns suck. As does having to accept that your really excellent earlier efforts have stopped working. I'm crossing my fingers that this miserable diet will put you in a really good position - maybe maybe no needles.

S said...

I've never thought about those 2 meanings of diet before. That's fascinating, really. Hmm...

I'm so impressed with Monkey's behavior -- don't think my boys could have done that.

meg said...

Yeah, I think the way Monkey occupied herself is pretty darn impressive.

I certainly did not get the impression that you're all hot to try IVF, from your last post. Just that, after reading so much about all our experiences with RE's, that you are educated and prepared to deal with it. I hope for no needles for you, but if they do...I swear, they are not that bad at all (though slightly worse than those tiny acupuncture needles I used to get). That appointment at the clinic will be here before you know it and then, when a plan is decided upon, I'm sure you'll feel some relief. Waiting really is the worst part of it--at least it has been for me.

Anonymous said...

I think it's great that you're going in so prepared. I know from personal experience as a control freak it gives me great calm.

And here's hoping that diet wards of the needles.

Aurelia said...

You know what? You may not need IVF, instead it may be something else, something much easier.

But no matter how you do it, does it really matter as long as you get a living healthy baby in the end? A few dildocams, a few shots, a few pills, and maybe just maybe you'll get what you want.

So cheer up my sweet. It isn't all bad.